Our local Council asks ministers to open the their meetings with a short prayer. We do this on a roster system, and I'm always happy to let the others volunteer ahead of me, so I usually end up doing about one per year.
Today was my turn.
I got there early, and discovered that they had already convened for a less formal discussion about some of the long-term planning issues that had to be determined. They finished at about 12.55 pm, had a quick lunch and resumed at 1.10 for the formal meeting.
I had written out a brief list of things to mention: Wish them Merry Christmas, say John 3:16, then pray. I knew exactly what I was about, the words to say etc.
As I waited to be called I noticed that I was getting more and more anxious so that I was really worked up by the time I had to speak. I did my thing and left as quickly as I could.
I'm not sure why it is, but I always feel intimidated in that setting. Maybe it's insecurity or not feeling good enough or maybe the knowledge that the prayer means more to me than it does to them. Perhaps it's the feeling of being on show in a forum that's not my own environment.
Anyway, that job's out of the way now until next March. That gives me lots of time to worl on my self-esteem!
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